Scrolling through Facebook, the motherhood related pages that I have ‘liked’ constantly have articles relating to the ‘one and done’ moms. Mothers who have chosen to have one child and one only.
Last night, I was with some of my MOMS Club friends and we had the same conversation. All three of the ladies currently had one child ranging from 2 to 4 years old. We joked about baby fever, holding other peoples babies, the idea of starting over, and it got me to thinking.
While the world may never understand why you would want to have only one child, I want you to know – I get it and I back you up momma. This may sound somewhat odd coming from someone like me who not only has two children but had two children under two.
After having Camden, my husband and I joked about not having anymore. We said he was perfect and we should just have him. Then we decided it wasn’t fair, he deserved a sibling to grow up with. Four months later I stopped taking the pill, a month later I got pregnant, 25 months later – we have a 16 month old beautiful little girl that I couldn’t imagine life without.
But with that being said – I got pregnant while Camden was 5 months old and had Lily when he was 14 months old. I had a newborn baby only two months after Camden left the ‘infant’ stage. I didn’t have to start all over with another baby because I never left the trenches of newborn and infant life. I didn’t experience all that TODDLERHOOD had to offer (i.e. tantrums, attitudes, independence, etc.) until Lily was already almost a year old.
Looking at it now.. if we had waited until Camden was 2 years old (like we originally thought we would) I think I would have reconsidered the idea of one and done. Children, especially toddlers, are hard work. They’re exhausting. Having a children that is already into their toddlerhood and beyond makes bringing home a new baby sound like even more work.
I love my children, their age gap, their sibling love, and their disagreements. Watching them grow together is an amazing gift but I totally see the other side of it. I do.
So ‘one and done’ mommas – I feel you. I support you. Enjoy your little person and all of their stages, give them all the attention, and soak up every minute of your lives with your little one. They don’t NEED siblings – thats what school friends are for (haha).
xoxo K